why is it that the words are more profound with the music behind them? why do they feel so incriminating when you weigh them against your own existence? why does it feel so wrong to believe in them, but not live them?
recently my aunt pam told me my mother has always been unhappy. that she is just an unhappy person; always wanting what she cannot have...thinking if she could just have a bigger house, more luxurious trips, a better car, she will be happy. funny, i'd never even considered it, but it is entirely true. and i fear that i have adopted that way of life from her. i can't really remember one instance where i was not 100% focused on what i wanted in the future, what i was trying to get next. and i hate that. so change it, right? one of many changes that need to occur in my life. okay.